Just wondering?

Should you let someone ruin your happiness? I honestly was happy last night for hours, but something happened in my family. Well it was basically my Dad yelling like mad and I got scared and I cried (I feel like baby and I'm 19. 19 is too old to cry, it's a sign of weakness) Anyway I'm back to the way I've been feeling-SAD.

Firstly, don't beat yourself up for crying. Crying is not necessarily a sign of weakness and no age is too old to cry. It's different if you cry for each and every thing --- it's still not weak, it's just annoying for you and probably others.

Going on to your next question --- if you feel strongly about others making you feel the way you feel, you may want to change that --- it is normal to get scared and upset a bit, but I guess in situations like this, you need to challenge what you are thinking. It's usually your thoughts that lead a person to feel a certain way and so zone in on those thoughts (which probably are negative or irrational in some cases) and challenge them and take control over how you feel. In that way, no one else is controllling you.

Hope this helps,

Good luck!
I'm 38 and cry all the time.

You're human, it happens.
No, you can't let your dad or anyone else ruin your happiness. It's okay to feel sad for the moment but don't let that feeling continue for long. You have to love yourself and not worry if you feel you are not doing anything wrong to cause his anger.

My dad used to "yell at me like mad" too when I was 19. Now that I'm much older and have a family of my own, I realize he had issues but he meant well. He was just having problems of his own and took his frustrations out on me. That's not right but I look back on all the great things he's done for me too, and that's out weighted the bad.

Of course, that's easy for me to feel that way now, since I don't have to live with the guy. My mother still does!!
never. happiness is a personal item. it is a branch of your integrity. letting someone control your mood is like letting them control your outcome and somewhat part of you life... if you stay happy, and you dont sweat it when you dad yells at you, then you will feel much better with yourself, although it is tough to accomplish. you will feel much better. your mood should only be changed by massive tragedy, and you and only you.
I'm sorry. There's little that I can say. But it does seem that families especially allow annoyance to turn to anger with each other. And people seem to hold grudges more deeply over smaller matters against each other as opposed to those on the outside. I have a notion about why that might be, but that's beside the point right now. Most people in, for instance, your father's position right now remember their excessive anger and regret it. Your dad is very likely to remember last night from time to time and feel badly about it.
This gives you an opportunity to learn from his mistake. Remember things like this, anger beyond what the situation really calls for. It will help you to avoid making the same mistake. And you will never regret that. good luck

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