Would this freak you out?

My long term partner (boyfriend) has opened a funeral parlour, after years of working in manufacturing (and working part-time for a local funeral director). Unfortunately, despite being quite old, I am terrified of dead bodies - never seen one - and anything associated with death. Eventually, he would like me to give up my job and work with him. How do I deal with this dicotomy? P.S. He does know that I have a phobia about death and dead bodies.

Answer:
Maybe it won't be so bad if you learn more about the profession and funeral parlors. I took a death & dying class a couple semester ago, and we had to watch a video on people who were going through mortuary school. It was actually quite interesting and made it less "scary" so to speak.

If you are totally against the thought of it, then just tell your partner that his work is NOT for you. You can still support what he does, but you do not have to join him. You can show interest in his work in other ways. Do what job/career makes you happy and let him do his.
No way I would I would ever do that.
it shouldnt freak you out, ever seen a dead body, they're not scary
and he'll be minted, funeral directors earn a fortune
I would be dead against it too.
I don't think it would freakme out, but i wouldn't be thrilled with it either.

Talk to a trained psychologist about this - not just us.

I am bothered that even though he KNOWS you have a phobia, he wants you to eventually give up your job to work with him. that seems REALLY insensitive, and like he doesn't have a clue how strong a phobia can be.
Go for it and stick to office work and you should be fine. It is great to be able to work with your partner and something I would love to be able to do.

Good luck
maybe he is trying to scare your old butt out the house. Dont be afraid of dead bodies, look on the bright side, now you have the chance to cure your phobia.
Just don't give up your job - stay where you are and don't work for him. I'm sure he'll understand if you tell him.
Phobias can be dealth with, regardless of whether they're phobias of bodies, cats, having your picture taken or words with the letter 'Q' in them.

Since however you've never actually SEEN an actual dead body, it's very possible that you're NOT as phobic as you imagine you are. Go with him and see one or two. Look at them clinically as what they are: A collection of chemicals and minerals which at one point was a person and is no longer one. See if being near a body is as bad as you imagine it, or if in fact instead it's kind of anti-climactic.
nothin to be worried about they are pretty much regular people but very pale.
death is natrual, i think after time you get use to it, but if you really are against it and feel you won't over come your phobia's tell your boyfriend he should understand.
Sounds like a dead end job to me.
Sounds like you two have some serious compatability issues.
dead bodies do not freak me out. i 'm 51 years old. i come from the south where the dead do not stay in a funeral home until burial they stay in the persons home where people sit up with them until the funeral. i've also had to deal with my mom's death ,my dad' s, all my brothers and sister. i do not fear death as i used to. i think you need to sit down with you boyfriend and tell him again how you feel about dead bodies and working with him in his line of work. if you can''t get through to him then you may need to rethink your relationship with him. both people in a relationship need to compromise and respect the other person's views about things.
I think I would have the same issues as you in the same position.

As he is aware of your phobia I think it is unfair of him to want you to give up your job and work with him.

You need to reiterate that you have a fear of dead bodies and that though you would love to work in a partnership with him you would gain no enjoyment or fulfilment from such a career change.
he knows about your phobia of dead bodies, he shouldn't pressure you into doing it and understand your reasoning behind it
If you can find a way to overcome this phobia, it would be the ideal sollution. Everything is possible.And death is a very normal end to a very normal thing-life.
But if you still fill terribly reppeled by this, i advise you to talk this with your partner out and explain him the horror you feel near a dead body.
I feel the same way you do about death and dead bodies. I think you should respect his decision to open and operate a funeral home and he should respect your decision to stay far far away from it and keep your regular job. Its selfish to expect you to work with him.
why fear of death? it is just natural part of life not the end. fear of the unknown is common---but a corpse is no threat to you. do you have anxiety walking in the grocery store meat aisle? once the spirit is gone the body is just flesh.
ever have a pet die? did you grieve and bury it- treating the corpse with love and respect in honor of the spirit that you loved but is now gone? could you give the same respect and honor to one you did not know or love?
it is no different it is just the point of view that is different.
hope this gives you something to think on.
i think it is a wonderful last service to give to another human being. you are doing the last act of love they will have shown to them on earth. their families need caring people to carry out their wishes for their loved one. you will do what they cannot do themselves. I saw my first dead body when mum died and amazingly it did not trouble me. it is usually the first time that worries you because you anticipate a dread. if you can focus on the needs of the grieving relatives and how you can make it easier for them, i am sure you will eventually be at ease. it could be that you do not need to deal with the bodies just the administration and liaison with the relatives. God bless
death is a fact of life. something we all have too deal with at some point. none of us like it but if you have respect for the body and the person it once was, then that will stand you in good stead. we need people who care to do this job and not just people in it for the £££££££££££
The Dead is nothing to worry about its the living we should be worried about, the dead cant hurt you, my grandfather used to work in a morgue dressing the bodies he was only 17 in those days you had candle light to see, he knee led on the bed where the body was it sat up and blew the candle out" freaky yes, but once you die the bodies gasses and air have to escape by any means, so its not freaky its a part of life, the only one guarantee in life is death. i have great respect for your partner. if its not your idea of fun, explain you can do it and if he loves you he will understand. even if you did help him out just say you could do the paper work side of things and darkening the calls being sympathetic to the relative on the phone. discuss this with your partner. hes the best one to help you. good luck x
u could look at it one or 2 ways..


ew ew ew dead body! no touchy!

or you could look at it like this...Ur trying to help ease the pain of the deceased persons living relatives by making the person look good thier last day above ground.

it may sound odd...but it does put a little ease in someone's heart to see someone they loved looking nice...even if it is painful.
Personally, I'd think that was a cool line of work. But, since we're all different, I recommend on really figuring out and clarifying where you stand on this issue. Since you are the one who - ahem - goes with you to the grave, honor, respect, and love yourself first. Sacrificing personal happiness or facing fears when you are not ready to do so will only breed problems down the road for the two of you.

If you are not ready to face your fears, then you need to let your partner know where you draw the line for your own sanity's sake. Also, I'm sure that you know that trying to keep him from achieving his goals because of your own fears is unfair to him. This may mean you may not make happy partners any longer. If you are not willing to lose him, then face your fears. Not only do you get to keep your relationship, but you become a stronger and more peaceful person because you've laid your fears to rest. (R.I.P. : Fear)

If you are ready to face your fears, then let that be your next question on this forum...

Cheers. :-)
That would freak me out yes.
Seeing dead bodies daily doesn't seem like a good idea.

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