3 questions. Do you really care if a suicidal person...?

commits suicide? If so what would you be willing to do to stop them? Have you ever stopped to think that things you say can cause another to feel suicidal, I mean especially on YA, I've noticed a lot of people have no regard for others when answering questions?

You know its beautiful to read some of these answers. These people are strangers but obviously their heart goes out to ones who feel this way. Most of us I believe would do anything to stop a person from suicide, but many of us really don't know what to do. When a person is suicidal their thoughts and logic are all mixed up, its like their locked in a dark cupboard with no light switch and no door handle to get out. Even reasoning with them about how much they have to live for and who loves them, and to count their blessings or to look to tomorrow just seems useless. In their minds they've already done those things and can't really see anything really good there anyway. Of course there is but its just that their problems seem so huge and inescapable. Sometimes the emotional pain has continued for years without letup and they cannont stand it anymore. The way I believe is a good way to help those ones is to help them enjoy life again. We must take the inititiave to bring a little light into their lives again. We must reinstill laughter, love, new brighter experiences, positivity. Dwelling on their problems can lock them into their already negative thinking patterns, they need to start making new brain patterns. The brain can do this literally, but of course it takes effort and self-discipline. Our thoughts ABSOLUTELY affect our health and our feelings. Have you ever been sitting on your own and thought of something ridiculous and began laughing. It made you feel good. What about when you couldn't stop thinking about a guy you just met, the more you think about him the more romantic you FEEL. The more you dwell on somebody that has betrayed your trust the more resentment, anger, venom you feel. Then you can spiral into a more downward motion of feeling a victim. We are all victims at some stage of our life. We all suffer injustice at some stage. We all feel hopelessness too. But can you see that our thoughts can affect how we feel. When we feel like that refuse to let those thoughts take hold, put some good music on that actually can really lift the mood. Prayer, supplication, a loving friend. A kiss and a cuddle, and doing something for someone else is a wonderful help as we stop thinking of ourselves and look at others in an unselfish way. Remember there is more happiness in giving than receiving. It is really one of the best medicines of all!
This is just a forum...meant to be taken lightly...but its true, alot of people are more mean than they should be. p.s. r u suicidal? don't do it! suicide is not the answer!
Yes. I am limited to tell them the truth though. I would never be cruel, but people do have a tendency to play about things they shouldn't. I do what I can.
Dear rwalke01
Yes it matters. I have personally stopped people doing the do and I have also held them in my arms and watched the light go out in their eyes. Everyone matters as there is only one DNA like theirs in 6 billion other people. A unique and important creature therefore.
Personally I believe that however bad things are you don't know everything about to happen thus you don't have all the facts.
There could be a top event "heading" your way in a day or so that you would massively miss out on. The main thing is though you remember that there is only one of you...A lot of trouble for the Universe to go to when mass production is the in thing. That means every person is worth a second glance or kind word, or share your meal or hold them close or whatever it takes to pause them to notice that suicide isn't the way...
I have avoided close contact with this sort of tragedy, but recently it found it's way to effect my family. Yes, of course you care! Immensely! If burns to your soul.

I would be willing to do a lot to help a person, but I have also had to remind myself that they must want the help, and if not, it's not my fault.

People say hurtful things because they feel an ere of invincibility that comes with the anonymity of being on-line.

No one should take these people seriously on here. It's pretty easy to tell who is browsing around here with the intention of dolling out useless comments, and those that really want to express their opinions, share their experiences, and truly try to help others.

If you have been slighted on this sight or seen others insulted, do what you can, defend and continue to be one of the people that contributes helpfully to the benefit of others.

Great question BTW, and worded very well.

The only thing that gets to me on this site is how no one want to use punctuation! It makes it very hard to understand what they are trying to ask.

Best of Luck
well love, you must 1st understand that if that person is destine fir that, there is nothing another can do, one can try but when someone is set in their mind , It can/cannot be changed in most cases. it's a very hard and usually unsuccesful challenge that one faces and of course the 1 that tried to help or change the situation is hurt the most when and if the above person actually follows thru with it, it hurts those that cared and wanted to help the most! I hope you have not experienced this personally because it is very devastating, and if you have not and are worried about this happening to a loved one or friend, I wish I had your answer, but I do not darling I am almost 40 tears old and have lost 5 friends in younger years to this and it was very painful, I finally accept it that they went to a better place above and tho I am not religious, and do not agree, that is perhaps the reason I am not religious to this day, for they had so much ahead of them and never got to experience it! I hope this helped and hope you rcv other replys that help with the answer you are looking for! With that I send my love and will pray that you find your answer! Craig
Yeah think I thought about it when I was 13...the thing is that life changes, there is always new chances to move on, all u have to do is being patient and understand that the ups and downs are normal.

And pls, dont rely ur mood and happines to whatever people say about u...ok?
Three answers -

1. These are only my thoughts as I'm not an 'expert' on this subject (if there is any such thing). If I knew that a person was suicidal, I would care enough to try to help them. Sometimes, I'm sure it feels like no-one cares (in reality - some people probably don't care enough to do/say something) as I have been in this situation myself, but remember, not everyone would pick up on the cues, unless the cues were obvious and even then people react differently to the same situation.

2. I'm not pretending that it would be easy to stop someone who was intent on harming themselves from carrying the threat out, but there must be a point where they feel utter hopelessness and I'm convinced that their thinking would go from rational to irrational at a certain point in time, if it wasn't irrational to start with. Obviously it is a cry for help and listening would be the first step in trying to help them step back into rationality and feel that life was still worth living.
I think it is the irrational thought that 'death seems preferable to the mental anguish that I experience with life' that permeates the memory and needs challenging objectively, not subjectively.

3. Psychologists would say that we as individuals are ultimately not responsible for the way another person feels as it is our self that chooses to feel one way or another. It's about externalising blame, trying to justify our own behaviour on another's actions (e.g. harsh words on YA). People will do and say what they want -sometimes at the expense of others, I know that this is sometimes hurtful, but it is reality as we don't live in an ideal world where reality has a habit of interfering!

Hope that helps - I care!
My dear.. I do care and so does many people. I still think about those people who died in accidents, murdered, suicide eventhough I don't know them. I'm 38 now and I still think about my friend who died a long time ago, how it would be wonderful to see him again. But they're are gone and it makes me sad thinking about them sometimes.

Yes, if I have the power I will stop their death.

Please don't take seriously what mean people say. You have the POWER to choose what you want to hear or read. Just concentrate in finding your own happiness. Because YOU are the most important person to yourself.

Take care and God bless :-)
1. Kind of, it depends on whether or not I like them (sad but true)
2. Yes, I have. I do not make insensitive comments on YA, especially questions about suicide.
3. Yes, I have noticed that.
yes i would
I would definitely care and try to help if someone were considering suicide. Sometimes they just need someone to listen to them, so that they know someone cares and someone hears them. No matter how bad life seems, you really never know what's going to happen next. I agree that there are people who say very cruel things in Y!A, and I don't understand why that is. I guess they're unhappy themselves. I read a story one time about a high school boy walking home from school who saw another boy drop all of his books. He ran over and helped him pick them up (all the while thinking - why is this nerd bringing home all these books on a weekend?) Anyway, it was a new boy in school and he helped him carry his books home. He casually mentioned to the boy that a group of them were playing basketball that night, and he should join them. Over the years, they became quite good friends, and this boy ended up being a sports star and popular and academically gifted. Well, to make a long story short, years later at college graduation, the boy (the one had dropped his books) was the valedictorian, and he said in his speech that he had been planning to kill himself at one time. He decided to bring all of his books home to save his mother the pain of having to clean out his locker after he was dead, and that on his way home, a kind person stopped to help him, and then offered him friendship. He then said the boy's name and everyone stood up and applauded for him. I guess you never really know what someone's life is like - a smile or a kind word from you could make all the difference in the world.

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